More Bad Weather, But a Good Day

Oddly enough, this is the first picture of all of us as a family of 5. We just never thought to do it before today. I guess everyone had better get used to this new look.

To start off with, today was our “integracion.” Cutting to the chase, apparently everything went well and the kids are still with us. Now for the filler . . . As some of you blog-stalkers may already know from previous blogs, this is when we meet again with the social workers and they sort of interview the family after we’ve been with the kids for a little while. It has always been our understanding that the purpose of this was to see that a family bond is starting and that this adoption will work out in everyone’s best interests. Like any family, we have our daily issues and problems, but they seem to be a little magnified when someone is coming to interview you and your kids about how you are getting along. So, we were a little nervous going in.

We first met our social worker when we were in Ubate to be united with Andres and Maria. However, rather than trek all of the way back out there for the integracion, she set the meeting for 9:00 a.m. at the compound. Carmen, the lady at our front desk, told us that it wasn’t important that we necessarily dress up. Still, she said the ladies working in the house were going to make sure the downstairs was extra clean on Friday morning. This sends kind of a mixed message if you ask me (you don’t dress up but we are going to clean?). So how do you look presentable, but not like you are trying too hard. Khakis! I brought two pair for such confusing times.

Our social worker arrived a little after 9:00 a.m. accompanied by a younger woman that did not introduce herself. The four of us and Carmen (acting translator for the moment) sat down in the living room area while the kids played around us. We started by just kind of engaging in some informal discussions and Traci & I kept wondering when the integracion was going to actually begin. They asked about Maria and we explained that she was getting better every day. Then they happened to ask Maria, who was sitting on my lap at the moment, if she liked her new family. She giggled and replied with a “si.” And that was pretty much it for integracion. It was over before we even knew it started. It wasn’t anything like the awful interrogation we were expecting. We signed a few more papers and one of the motorcycle couriers ran them off to Oscar so that he could get the legal paperwork filed today if possible. If they do not get anything on file today, it will have to wait until Tuesday because Monday is yet another Colombian holiday (Corpus Christi).

We also learned that the legal proceedings portion of the adoption will not be taking place in the Bogotá courts. The filing will be in some little city or district outside of Bogotá and the name of it is . . . written on a piece of paper that I cannot find right now. The upshot of this is that we should “move a little faster.” Of course, nobody can put a timeline on that, but we were told that nothing is going to happen next week. So don’t expect us home next weekend.

As beautiful as Bogotá is, we’ve decided that we are going to get out of here for a few days and go to Cartagena. We kind of wanted to see a little more of Colombia. That, and the weather here is just killing me. The first couple days weren’t bad, but the rain the past few days has made it almost impossible to get out and do anything. With Carmen’s help, we found a reasonable travel package though Avianca Airlines that will get us to Cartagena on May 27 and we can return to Bogotá on June 2. Cartagena is on the Caribbean coast and should be a little more tropical than the mountains we are in now. The beach is not supposed to be the best, but there is a pool in our hotel and the kids can probably spend days there alone without leaving. So, we are looking forward to a change of pace and seeing more of this wonderful country.

I have to add that the relationship between Traci and Maria seems to be getting much, much better today. When it comes to hairstyling, Papi’s got no skilz. After a couple of “ouches” this morning, I was fired. Mami was called in off the bench without any warm ups and did a great job with these little clip things with the teeth (Guys, you will know what I am talking about. Whenever you see one you can hardly resist picking it up and pretending it is eating something). It looked great and almost lasted through the whole integracion meeting. I think we are going to have to look for something else. Oddly, when I found myself sitting in the Unicentro mall (described below) later in the day with nothing to do but watch people, I found myself looking at the way women had they hair tired up and pulled back for ideas. Is this what women do at the mall? They look at each other’s hair?

After we got all of next week’s travel wired, we thought he might try going to the Unicentro mall to walk around and just look at people and things. We got everyone bundled up and by the time we hit the door it started raining again kind of hard. So, we went back up to the room and tried to make the best of things. Luke played with his Nintendo DS which he surprisingly hasn’t done much at all this trip. Maria and Andres watched DVD’s and played with Play-Dough for a bit. However, Andres kept wanting to eat the Play-Dough so that activity was cut a little short.

As for Maria and Andres, it appears that now both of them have come down with a little stomach virus or something. Andres was kind of fussy all day and had at least 4 complete blow outs (for the record, I changed 3 of them. So don’t believe anything Traci says about my diaper changing while down here). Maria didn’t eat much and complained that her stomach hurt (Luckily she is out of diapers but made several trips to the restroom for “po po.” The other one is “chi chi.” Some of these expressions are just going to have to stay in their verbal lexicon even after we get back to the States and they learn English. They are just too funny). They are now both getting a little medicine and we are hoping for a quick recovery.

Lunch was some kind of breaded and fried chicken kabob. Of course, now the El Refugio chefs were speaking Luke’s language (breaded and fried!). And with Maria and Andres not eating well, there was plenty to go around. It’s kind of hard for me to understand how two little kids that eat so many healthy fruits and other foods can ever get sick. Andres will drink fruit juice all day if you let him (and we don’t). They also served some kind of pumpkin soup that Traci just loved (I think it was pumpkin, but it might have been some other type of gourd). I thought it was pretty good, but it won’t be on the list of recipes I would ask for. After lunch it was pretty clear that Maria and Andres needed naps. There was still plenty of fussing and crying but it seems to get less and less every day.

While the kids were down, I ran off to the Unicentro mall to buy our plane tickets and travel package. I went alone and must have let my guard down traveling without kids because I almost got run over twice on the way there. Avianca has a shop in the mall and although we had made the arrangements on the phone, I had to get down there and pay before the end of the day or the reservation would be lost. They have one of those “take a number” systems with the “now serving #?” signs like at the DMV. It didn’t take long for me to get to the counter, but it took forever to get the tickets after that. Next, I ran over to the Exito and purchased some of those little travel tissue packs. We had a bunch that we brought with us expecting some colds from some or all of us at various points. However, they seem to just disappear around our little room. It wasn’t until I got to the check out line that I noticed it was 3:45 and we had made plans with another family to have ice cream at 4:00.

I pretty much jogged home, collected the family and I think we were about 3-4 minutes late getting to the ice cream shop, (Mimo’s?). The other family we were sharing ice cream with were Dave and Sheila Derr and their little Jonatan who they adopted from Pereira. We saw them on Sunday, our first full day here, but without Maria and Andres. They got a little hung up trying to travel back to Pennsylvania and do not end up leaving until tomorrow. The kids got along great, particularly Jonatan and Andres, and we had fun chatting and sharing stories with another couple going through similar times. For two kids with sore stomachs, Maria and Andres sure enjoyed their ice cream. Of course, the ice cream shop had a play gym in it and Luke went crazy while we could hardly get Maria or Andres inside. After ice cream we walked them back to the Derr’s B&B, La Zeutana, which we had heard a lot about (see blogs for Hollis and Boyachek families) but never seen. We were also a little curious since there is a chance that when were return from Cartagena we might have to go to another B&B. Carmen has assured me that we will likely get to come back to the familiar confines of El Refugio, but I wouldn’t expect tem to hold anything for us if another family is coming to town. Anyway, it was great meeting the Derrs (again) and we wish them the best of luck in their travels home.

Dinner back at the compound was rice, some kind of meat and another thing that we couldn’t really recognize. It wasn’t that bad, but I just have no way to describe what it was like. I guess I should have brought the camera to dinner again. I don’t think a lot of other people liked it either as I saw lots of left-overs on other tables and in the kitchen. Not the best dinner we had, but since Maria and Andres weren’t really eating much of anything it didn’t matter too much. They did bring out cantaloupe for desert which, naturally, they did eat. Luke, on the other hand, reverted to his old ways and opted for some reheated, 6 day old pizza we had in our frig.

Another sort of interesting thing in the compound is that after dinner each family busses their own table and brings their dishes back to the kitchen. It’s kind of nice and helps to create an atmosphere where we are all one big family. And when you have older kids you are adopting, you can start right away with everyone knowing their role around dinner time with cleaning up.

Bed time comes pretty quickly after dinner and each night of getting Maria and Andres to bed gets easier and easier. However, tonight the kids took a giant step forward. First of all, when told it was time for bed, Maria came right up, put on her jammies, brushed her teeth and got into bed with no crying whatsoever. Maria was in a pretty good mood going to bed tonight. She gave besos and brazos to everyone – not just papi. Even Andres didn’t shed a tear when eventually put down in his crib. Could just be that they weren’t feeling well but I like to think that we have turned a bit of a corner.

Maria, Andres and I laid in Maria’s little bed and I read “Quiero a mi papi” (again) and the “My First 1000 Words” book. Maria likes doing the “Words” book. But I think we started a bad practice the previous night. After I read the English word for each picture, I asked her to say it for me. She has a bit of a problem (in Spanish and English) getting all of the syllables into her words. However, after she nailed a couple of short words in English, Traci and I were giving her high fives and knuckles (banging fists together). Tonight, whether she said the English word right or wrong, she would throw her hand up for high fives and knuckles – and after EVERY word. So, we only got through a couple pages but we had fun. Luke came in at one point and helped by reading the English words for us tonight.

Couple funny things about the word book before I start uploading pictures. We tried the word Sopa (Spanish) and Soup (English). Seems like an easy enough transition. However, no matter how many times Maria tried to say “soup” (and it was quite a few), it always came out “sopa!” Then, after everyone was in bed, I pulled out my laptop onto my bed to check email and start the blog. As soon as I got it turned on, I hear Maria’s little voice from the bed next to mine say, “computer.” That was one of tonight’s words and it looks like she is a quick learner.

Thanks for comments and I am sorry I haven’t gotten to answer any questions tonight. We’ll try to get a better jump on things tomorrow.


Maria took this picture (with a little help from papi) at the integracion meeting. in the middle is Lucia who is the main point person for our agency in Colombia. She's a fantastic lady. To her left is her son David who serves as translator for English speaking folks. I got to talk with him a bit in the kitchen over coffee afterwards and he's an interesting guy. I hope we get to meet him again.


Another picture by Maria (with help from papi) of Traci who I think really felt like a mami today.


I guess I took this one as it looks like it was taken by a taller person. To the left of Traci is the social worker we have been working with. I can't recall her name right now but it is on a bunch of papers in the closet.



Andres trying on some Jayhawk hats. The red hat is actually Luke's. Not surprisingly, there is nothing from Michigan State in either of the kids closets at the moment. I guess it is my fault for not shopping for their clothes.


After we kind of got rained in, Maria wanted to listen to the iPod for a while. Of course, once she found "Maria" she played that about 6-7 times. She even started singing the parts where they just say, "Maria, Maria, Maria."


Later the smaller kids settled into a movie while Luke became engrossed in Nintendo DS. I can't recall which movie the kids were watchig here but we figured out how to get it to play in Spanish which increased their attention span a little (not much but a little). We also had to put a magazine over the buttons because Andres kept wanting to push them.


Just a random picture down the street on my "jog" home from the Unicentro. I just wanted to give people a flavor for how screwed up the sidewalks are. And these are nice compared to the sidewalks on the main drag on the other side of the compound.


Jonatan Derr and Andres Jensen at the ice cream shop.


Luke and Maria apparently taken by surprise while eating ice cream.


By this point in the day, Maria and Andres were kind of wearing down and they colds taking effect. While Maria cracked half of a smile, I had some difficulty getting Andres to even recognize the camera. In fact, thinking back we didn't get too many smiles from Andres today. He such a great character and his smile always brightens a room.


Luke and mom. Two people that have shown a lot of courage on this trip. So far, everything has been a lot easier on me.


And here we are with the Derr family. Very nice people. I'm glad I got to know them.


Luke going crazy in another ball pit. I'm pretty sure that by the time I get home I will not be anxious to go into another restaurant with one of these in it.


Maria found a rocking horse at La Zeutana. This is actually a retake. She is now asking to see the pictures we take of her and will sometimes ask for a retake.


In this picture I think Jonatan was trying to tell Andres that they had some work to do in the back yard of La Z, but Andres claims to be on a union break - and that if Jonatan doesn't like it he can take it up with his commitee man.


Yeah, we taught Jonatan how to give knuckles. If toddlers start doing this n your town, I know who to blame and their initials are Mimi and Papa Bill.


Saying goodbye and good luck to the Derr family. Luke took this picture. Not too bad, eh? As you can see, Maria and Andres had about enough by this point.